201 support - reflective account for working with an unhappy parent

[gal4God]

i need to write a relective of a time i have delt with a unhappy parentor member of staff. i haven't so i've been asked to make up a time i have and say what i would do. any ideas?

[Heidi]

Just think up some reasons why a parent or member of staff would/may be unhappy and then think of how you can resolve the situation.

A parent may suggest that their child is unhappy because another child is hitting them. - how are you going to resolve this? Is this really happening?

You may know this not to be true -
Because the child is new/has something going on at home i.e. new baby etc and a practitioner has been settling in and playing with that child, and you feel the child may want to stay at home with their mother. You will then have to think how you are going to explain this sensitively and so that the mother is happy to continue to bring their child to the setting.

If you feel that it is not true because all staff ensure everyone understands the settings 'golden rules' and you have plenty of staff to keep an eye on things, but are not 100% because you may not have seen everything. You then have to reassure that parent to the best of your knowledge you are not aware of any incident, but you will speak to the other staff, observe etc - or deal with it however you feel is best. You will know your parent/carer and the child. Remember to write that you will assess and evaluate the situation and show understanding and sensitivity in any situation.


Staff member - what could make them unhappy?
possibly another member of staff always arriving late and not 'pulling their weight' in the duties you are expected to do before you open up - risk assessments, cleaning toilets/cloakroom, getting fresh water & beakers ready etc.

How would you resolve this one? Again assess it - the other member of staff may have a valid reason that they arrive later (but still in time for work). You may have varied options - if you feel this is fair and you felt that member of staff had a valid reason and there was no reason for the 'late' staff member not coming in earlier - have a quiet word with them explain etc.

if you feel that staff member has a good reason for arriving later i.e. they may be a carer for elderly relatives that live with her family, you can either explain this to the unhappy member of staff who may then understand, or you can see that she is a good member of staff with a valid reason, you don't want her to be unhappy, leave or feel put upon - if you can afford it - how about giving them something like 3 days bonus money in the summer holidays - but tell them, it my change if circumstances change i.e. a new member arrives and everyone chips in. She may feel better because that little bit of extra pay makes her feel valued.


I've made these situations up - but I'm sure these are typical 'happenings' somewhere. I hope these help, you may be able to think of better situations now.
Another favourite is when a mother comes in because their child has sworn at home - but you and the other members of staff have never heard anyone including their child swear. That one was true and we (or rather the mother) found the culprit - it was her husband swearing at other motorists as they drove too slowly etc. He'd momentarily forgotten his child was in a car seat in the back and did not think they'd remember that word having only heard it a couple of times - and was not going to confess until he had to!

[Ruthierhyme]

Hi, it may help if you have your setting's policies and procedures to look through.

If a child tells their parent that they had been hit, bitten, pushed or scratched there would be a reason why they'd disclose that information.

It hurt, it upset them, it makes them fearful of returning, as a way of gaining attention, as a reason to explain something.

Children may not remember or know everyone's name in their setting so may choose one they are most familliar with.

Explaining that you will talk to the child about what happened and sort out how to stop anything like that from happening again helps to assure those involved you are serious about resolving any problems.

Alternatively if your role is a temporary or new one it may be recommended that you pass on information to a colleague until you are familiar with situations, procedures and practice - in this scenario you would maybe invite the parent in, organise things so that your colleague could chat to the parent.

A few other examples an unhappy parent may pop in ..

• Foods and drinks had been served that were unsuitable for a child's diet/health or the famillies lifestyle - vegetarian, vegan, coealiac sufferer.
• Child left the setting having visibly injured themselves and no follow up care/documentation was given or requested.
• Child left the setting in winter without their coat on.
• Child left the setting with wet clothing from an activity or was left unchanged when they had soiled clothing.
• Personal items- toys, soothers, hair bobbles taken into the setting had become damaged, taken out or lost.
• Setting expectations & home communications - parents are unhappy with a settings expectation to play with their child/children, to donate, provide food/clothing, return things by a date, collect things by a date, chat, read, inform, teach, show, discuss, correct, improve or better what their child does, doesn't, may or maynot know or do.
• A parent has concerns over safety - equipment is unsafe, adult to child ratio is unsafe, activities are unsafe
• Parent objects to activity ideas.
• Parent objects to multi faith awareness.
• Parent objects to links in the local or wider community being made.
• Parents are concerned when a child mentions they have no friends or that no one likes them.

If colleagues are taking days off, arriving late/not at all and expecting you to take on their responsibilities, at level 2 I would think you'd be expected to chat with more senior staff to help resolve what's going on.

Addressing prejudice and discrimination can also be awkward but a necessary part of working together - A colleague/staff member says they don't like a child, their family or the families views.

Hth xx